Have you ever wondered why it is that even though we feel so strongly about being pro-life, we have so much medical, spiritual, and testimonial evidence on our side, and we are willing to get out there and give 100% of our hearts, souls, and minds, we still fail, much of the time, to bring women to a life decision? Have you ever stopped to think about that? One-half of all unintended pregnancies end in abortion. One-half! Does that sound like a winning number to you? Is the other half won over by our wisdom, charm, and assistance? Although there are no numbers I can verify (which doesn't make me feel secure), I would hazard to say that the other half is broken into 2 groups - one group has an unintended pregnancy but will not abort for various reasons, and the other group is the group that decides, after weighing out the abortion option, that she will give birth to the child.
In short, half of pregnancies are unintended. One-quarter of those pregnancies result in birth because the mother will not consider abortion, and the other 3/4 of those pregnancies involve a mother who actively decides between abortion, parenting, and adoption. 66% of those women...the deciders...choose to have an abortion.
Ladies and gentlemen, since the truth is on our side, surely we can do better than a 33% success rate! Couldn't it even be said that a 33% "success" rate isn't successful at all?
Something needs to change. Something isn't working - based on those numbers and based on what I have seen and heard throughout the "deciding" community, in which I am firmly ensconced. Women are thinking that they will be helped more by the abortion advocates than they would be by the pro-life advocates. I know why. It's not a state secret. Women feel that the pro-choice community is concerned for them while the pro-life community is not.
Let's think for a moment. What in the world would give them that impression? I think our respective titles say it all. Pro-life. What does that invoke in you? It has a beautiful ring to it, doesn't it? Who could be against the life of a beautiful unborn child after all? Who could be against life in general?
But, to the deciding woman, she hears you caring about her baby's life - and not her own. Pro-choice, however, well, that has an awfully nice ring to it when you're a deciding woman. If I'm a deciding woman, I'm going to hear "it's about you" from the pro-choice crowd. I'm going to hear "this isn't about the life of your baby, it's about your life" from the pro-choice crowd. I'm going to hear "an abortion will help you regain control" from the pro-choice crowd. I have to tell you, when you're in a situation where your entire life will be uprooted and flushed down the proverbial toilet by having a baby, that is going to sound very enticing. Wave a magic wand...everything goes back to normal...
How can we fix this? How can we change the way the deciding woman feels about the pro-life community? Again, this is not a big surprise. If Planned Parenthood et al. is able to comfort these women, make this about them, and "solve" a "problem" they are having, that is what we need to do as well, but for some reason, many pro-lifers feel that to talk about anything other than the baby and/or God in this situation is to break some kind of ethical/moral code. Where is it in the rulebook that we aren't allowed to make this about the woman? Making this about women will gain trust and offer concrete, tangible help.
I do not mean that this should be done in a manipulative way, however. We need to care for the women on the exact same level that we care for her unborn child. If you cannot do that, dear reader, you are not going to be as successful as you could be as a life advocate. You are going to keep pulling in the same sorry statistics. I, for one, am not happy with that. Can we ever end abortion? No. Not without a miracle. Can we make it rare? Yes - if we're willing to reassess the way we have been operating and make room for change.
Until next time...
3 comments:
Food for thought. Especially the idea that having abortion readily available changes a pregnant woman from a mom to a 'chooser." Gonna mull on that.
I think they're all moms. Being pregnant in and of itself makes you a mother whether or not you recognize that title. But yes, unfortunately, having the choice of abortion does push every pregnancy into a choice and make the woman a decider IMO.
But it changes their mindset from, "I'm a mom!" to "I have to make a choice."
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